I don’t do new year resolutions.
I’ve tried in the past and I end up failing miserably somewhere around February 4th. Yep. That’s how long my willpower lasts. One month and four days. And then after I fail, I feel like, well, a failure. And it was the same vicious cycle every year. One time in high school my resolution was to give up caffeine. I lasted about 3 weeks, and then I chugged a coke until I almost got sick. And afterwards, I felt like a loser because I only made it 3 weeks.
I don’t need that kind of let down, ya know?
Plus, I think new year resolutions can be tricky. Unless it’s something you really, really desire and its something you really, really feel passionate about in your heart, then I think it’s just easy to throw in the towel and try again next year.
But, I know there’s always things I want to improve upon, and things I could change to better my life, and it’s nice to put those things into perspective as a new year gears up.
So, here’s a little list of non-new-year-resolutions, or resolutions shemesolutions, if you will. No promises to myself, just a little list of things I’d like to work on this year (or really things I should work on every year).
1. My relationship with Christ. This is always at the top of my list of improvements. That should tell me two things. 1. It’s incredibly, incredibly important, and 2. I’m not where I should be. And by improving my relationship with Christ, I mean deepening and strengthening my relationship with Him. The funny thing is, all of my other ‘improvements’ would be easier if I would work on my relationship with Him. For me, this means spending more time in prayer, more time in His Word, and more time preparing to worship Him, instead of just going through the motions of it. When it all comes down to it, my Savior is the center of everything, yet I don’t make Him the center of my life.
2. Motherhood. Last year was a totally new experience for me, being a mom. I look back on where I was a year ago, and I see how much I’ve grown since then. But yet, I look ahead of me and see how much growing I’ve got to do. I’m learning something new about motherhood every day. And just when I think I’ve got it figured out, PB throws a curveball. I’m beginning to realize that I’ll never have it ‘figured out’, but rather I’m just going to have to roll with the punches. I need to give my son more of ‘me’. And not the cleaning, cooking, organizing, worrying about the laundry ‘me’. I need to give him more of the tickling, race car driving, hide-and-seek monster, running wild through the house ‘me’. I struggle with this daily.
3. My role as a wife. See, many times I’m caught up in being the cleaning, cooking, organizing, worrying about the laundry, tickling, race car driving, hide-and-seek monster, running wild through the house ‘me’. And before I know it, we’re ready for bed and I still haven’t kissed Ben or told him I loved him. Every day is not perfect, and some days I want Ben to sleep outside in the dog house. But he’s my husband and my baby’s daddy, and I love him so much. I need to take more time to show him that. He deserves more than just my leftovers. Afterall, he my baby daddy, yo!
4. Keeping up with the whoevers. I’m just going to say this flat out. I am terrible to look at others’ lives and compare what they are doing to my own life. And then I feel like I’m a bad (insert here) for not living up to what they do. I visit some of my favorite home decor blogs, I feel like I live in a crap hole. I see a gracious mom of 5 who seems to have it nailed, and I feel like a terd. I visit fitness and style blogs and I feel like a frumpy Yoda. I’m never crafty enough, never gracious enough, never fit enough, never stylish enough, I’m simply never enough. Does anybody else struggle with this? Ugh, it’s such a stinkin’ stupid thing that I hate that I do. But yet, I still do it. I know it’s stupid. I know it’s irrational. I know my Savior made me for more than this.
5. Give more. More time, more effort, more support, more love, more resources, more friendship, more of me to others. God has blessed me far beyond what I deserve and I need to share my blessings with others. Period.
What about y’all? Do you have any non-new-year-resolutions?
Have a blessed Tuesday 🙂
