Motherhood is awesome. It really is. There is no greater satisfaction than seeing my little bald guy smile at me or reach for me. I love being PB’s momma and wouldn’t change it for the world. Buuuttttttttt……………
Motherhood is hard. Seriously, not an easy thing. Earlier, I mentioned that parenthood was no place for wussies. If that is true, then motherhood is no place for anyone who’s mental and physical endurance is anything less than that of Chuck Norris.
It seems to me in my relatively short time of joining the leagues of motherhood that b.a.l.a.n.c.e just might be the key. Problem is, I can’t seem to find that balance anywhere. I work full-time, go to school full-time, and somewhere in between that, I try to give PB the attention he needs, spend time with my best husband, cook, clean, and try to have at least 5 minutes of me time. That’s hard to fit in a 24-hour window. Heck, I think that’s hard to fit in any window!
I love spending time with PB. I love spending time with Ben. And I especially love the time we all spend together. But I noticed after PB’s birth, it was so much easier to forget about myself. I would give it all to PB and Ben, and by the end of the day, I would crash. My little hobbies and interests didn’t matter anymore. After all, I had a new hobby and a new interest in PB, right? Not necessarily. While PB is my new (and favorite!) interest, I realize that letting go of the ‘old’ me wasn’t good for any of us. While I was wrapping myself in momma and wife duties, I was forgetting about myself. Don’t get me wrong, my first and most exciting roles are being that of a wife and mom. But, I had 22 years of ‘me’ before I was wife, and 24 years before I was a mom. I think it’s important that I don’t just throw ‘me’ away. So in an effort to achieve some sort of balance with my new life, I want to set aside an hour or so here and there to enjoy ‘me’. I could sand my old dresser or stain my old cupboard. I might organize my closet or clean out the junk drawer. Heck, I might even throw caution to the wind and clean the baseboards! (As weird as that sounds, I actually love to clean and organize. It’s like I get a ‘high’ off of the final product, whether it be a color-coded closet, or a spotless kitchen floor, cleaning and organizing gets me pumped. Should I have posted that on the internet? Does this make me sound like a weirdo? Is this a sickness? Do all dogs go to heaven?)
I love spending time with PB. I love spending time with Ben. And I especially love the time we all spend together. But I noticed after PB’s birth, it was so much easier to forget about myself. I would give it all to PB and Ben, and by the end of the day, I would crash. My little hobbies and interests didn’t matter anymore. After all, I had a new hobby and a new interest in PB, right? Not necessarily. While PB is my new (and favorite!) interest, I realize that letting go of the ‘old’ me wasn’t good for any of us. While I was wrapping myself in momma and wife duties, I was forgetting about myself. Don’t get me wrong, my first and most exciting roles are being that of a wife and mom. But, I had 22 years of ‘me’ before I was wife, and 24 years before I was a mom. I think it’s important that I don’t just throw ‘me’ away. So in an effort to achieve some sort of balance with my new life, I want to set aside an hour or so here and there to enjoy ‘me’. I could sand my old dresser or stain my old cupboard. I might organize my closet or clean out the junk drawer. Heck, I might even throw caution to the wind and clean the baseboards! (As weird as that sounds, I actually love to clean and organize. It’s like I get a ‘high’ off of the final product, whether it be a color-coded closet, or a spotless kitchen floor, cleaning and organizing gets me pumped. Should I have posted that on the internet? Does this make me sound like a weirdo? Is this a sickness? Do all dogs go to heaven?)
Regardless, I believe a little ‘me’ time every now and then is essential and necessary for all parents. Which is why, tonight, Ben is going to play basketball and I am going clean out the fridge. Bow-chicka-wow-wow.
My FAVORITE things!
